WHATCHYA GONNA DO ABOUT IT, HAMMER???

One of my last paid gigs playing percussion was for MC Hammer on the track " Turn This Mutha Out". That badass conga part during the verse is me. Bitches have sampled it all over the place and I haven't seen a single residual. Still, I can't complain. I got on his payroll for like 18 months. I took my baggy pants per diem and started a call girl service called "The 4-Handed Hammer Polish". We made a pretty good run of it until The Clap sidelined a city councilman and we got raided. Ah, the 90s.

Suckle,
J-Stache